hexcorized | [ IC INBOX ] labyrinthum

[ Jayce's eyes shifting over his form make Viktor feel so very exposed. It was a silly and ridiculous thing to feel, since his body from a young age has been observed by doctors and nurses alike. But their eyes looking down at his broken and frail form never made him feel like this. When Jayce looks at him, it's like he's not enough, will never be enough, can't be...enough. But it's not anything Jayce himself is doing wrong; he knows, he knows now that the other will love him regardless of what he is, what he becomes, and maybe he's just still coming to terms with all of that. But he wants to be more for him, for them both, but he can't be. Not when he is like this.

So his eyes remain focused on the bedroom floor before they flutter as he looks back up at Jayce. God, Jayce is so beautiful. How could he ever think they were equals? Viktor's expression shifts into surprise and incredulity as he looks away again. ] Everything could use an improvement. I'm not quite sure that my sickly pallor, my eye bags, or the brace nailed into my spine and leg could be considered as-as beautiful.

[ All said so very matter of factly. ] But you have continued to surprise me with your answers. So I might be persuaded to keep an open mind.

[ Jayce's hand traces over Viktor's chest, where he can see a pretty striking difference in their skin tones. There's a flush on his face that reaches his ears as he admires the man he's standing near. He understands that the other sees him so differently than Jayce sees him. But for Jayce, he simply can't believe that he gets to indulge in this. That he gets to be close to Viktor in such a way that that he'd never expected.

He steps in close to the bed, pressing against the edge of it, his braced leg sliding between Viktor's legs so that they can be as close as possible for now. He knows they'll both be sliding further into the bed sooner than later. But for now he's okay like this. He's okay admiring Viktor and showering him with every ounce of affection that he has.

One hand settles on the other's head, the other shifts from his chest to his waist. He sighs, it almost takes him no effort to come up with an answer. His smile is a little cheeky, because really - he doesn't have some sort of brilliant answer, either. It's simple. ]

And all of those things are pieces of you that are a part of the whole. They don't somehow make you less. All you have to do is be Viktor. The Viktor I admire and adore. The Viktor who is beautiful.

[ Of course he wishes Viktor never had to deal with these things. But for him, they're simply a part of the person he loves so much - and he'd take Viktor with or without them. He wonders, hopes there's a way to make it more clear. He has a question. ]

So what of me, Viktor? A shattered leg, a scarred body. A mind so irreversibly tainted that I always have to remind myself it's real. [ Not to mention a mind that was always slowly working towards an edge long before the chasm. A mind his mother called unwell. ] Maybe you wish I didn't have to deal with it, but I know you don't see them as things that somehow make me less.

Edited 2025-04-21 16:14 (UTC)

[ A stuttered sigh manages to worm its way out of Viktor as Jayce teases his hand over his chest, his leg pressing between his legs gets another hitched breath. An innocent enough gesture, but the intent behind it is loud and clear. Viktor wants nothing more than for Jayce to continue, have his hands glide along the contours and ridges of his body, and the thought is enough to make his face go red hot down his neck and up to the tips of his ears. But his breath catches again in his throat for what feels like the umpteenth time today, and his eyes dart to look directly back at Jayce. His breath is shaky as he exhales and looks away, almost like he can't believe what he's hearing. ]

Jayce I-I can't. I can't accept that so easily. [ He truly can't even if Jayce makes it so abundantly clear and easy to accept. How is he just supposed to do it so effortlessly? He shakes his head and presses the heel of his palms to his eyes, almost like he's fighting to keep tears at bay again. Having some you've loved for over seven years say that the things you hate about yourself only make you beautiful is...so much. This whole time, he's only ever hated what he was unfortunately born with. A bad leg, a crooked spine, lungs that were diseased, none of it by choice, and all of it predetermined without so much as a chance. He never stood a chance, and yet Jayce finds them...beautiful? He finally removes his hands from his face and looks back at Jayce, eyes filled with surprise. ]

You are...you've always been perfect to me, Jayce. Your mind, your body, I could never see you as anything less than perfect, regardless. [ That confession slips out as his face lights up again. But he sighs as he lets out a soft laugh, thinking on his own answer, it does make his self-loathing a bit of a contradiction, doesn't it? ] I suppose it does make my argument a bit weak when you put it that way.

[ His smile is amused as he raises his hands to tug Jayce down towards him. His lips pressed against Jayce's once again, this time more insistent and hungry. ] I will always want to see you for who you are and nothing else.

[ Viktor's words echo in his mind. He had a feeling that turning it on himself would resonate with him a little more. He gets what he's dealing with, really. While Jayce has never struggled as intensely with his image - he knows what he's been through. He knows that the damage done to him is permanent, irreversible. But he also knows that he had to embrace those things about him to do what he could. He had to be persistent, just as he always had to be.

Jayce had always seen Viktor as someone persistent, too. Committed to their goals and work through it all, even in times when Jayce wasn't attentive.

He falls into Viktor, allowing himself to be pulled in. He smirks a little into the kiss. He feels a little victorious. ]

Mhm... [ A hum - a little suggestion that says he knows he's right - right now. ] I thought so.

[ Only because as a romantic he knows that to love someone is to love them wholly, entirely, and thoroughly. It means that it's just as Viktor says - that he will only ever see him for who he is and nothing else. He simply wishes for Viktor to have the best of this life.

He feels a lot more settled now, no longer needing to continue insisting. As long as the other understands how Jayce sees him, he'll be satisfied for now. Pulled towards Viktor, he leans into him, hands exploring the form under him. His hands tracing of the form of his back, slipping under the back of his unbuttoned shirt and moving softly, feeling the shapes of it. His movements are slow, callused fingers exploring every piece of his partner for the first time.

He lets out a pleased sound, thinking now only of this. How he'd like to explore every inch of Viktor with his hands and mouth. How he'd like to thoroughly taste and experience him. He wants to treasure and experience him in ways he's never gotten to before. He only gets one first time to experience Viktor, and he wants to ensure that he gets to fully.

His tongue moves past Viktor's lips, taking the chance to explore the other's mouth with his tongue. He pulls back a little, teeth catching on the other's lip only briefly, playfully. ]

I'm going to show you.

[ He says it again. ]

I'm going to show you what loving you means to me.

[ Viktor gives Jayce an almost annoyed look at that satisfied look and that hum, knowing full well that Jayce knows he's right. Then again Viktor finds that part of him so damn desireable too it's rather unfair. ] Don't let this one instance go to your head.

[ He's clearly at a disadvantage here, okay?! And it shows as Viktor's back arches, the places around the bolts in his spine are especially sensitive, as he lets out a pleased noise. Feeling Jayce's hands on his body in any place, any way, is electrifying. Then comes another kiss, and Viktor folds immediately, letting Jayce taste him, nip at his bottom lip, as he pulls away, and Viktor can only reply in kind with a scowl. ]

Then you better hurry up and stop teasing me.

[ A small hum in acknowledgement. He won't let it go to his head too much, at least. But he will enjoy the smallest victories with Viktor. He doesn't blame him for not fully knowing his worth and beauty. The world taught him that everything that was thought of as wrong with him was an imperfection only meant to be fixed and corrected. That having them was a mark on your beauty. Maybe it was Jayce's affection that helped him feel that way. Maybe it was simply Jayce being who he always was.

His eyes fall on Viktor's lips, face. Enjoying he way that the noises rise from Viktor's through when Jayce's fingers move over he sensitive pieces of Viktor's back. ]

I'm not teasing.

[ Okay, so he kind of is - a little bit. But he'd probably call it exploring instead. It's their first time together like this. He wanted to treasure it. So he kneels before Viktor, just as he had before their conversation started, and work on slowly undoing the brace. He starts near his ankle and foot, with a clear goal to work up.

After each piece is undone - he lets his hand rest on Viktor, fingers and thumbs working in gentle circular motions to massage him. He's working a little deeper this time. More intention behind the touch. As he works, he looks up at Viktor often, watching the man's face and reactions. ]

Are you trying to fool me, or yourself, with that?

[ Amused quip as he watches Jayce ever so attentively. The same feeling happens again, watching Jayce kneel before him sends a heat throughout his body that he knows is desire in its purest and primal form. He remains still as he watches Jayce slowly start to remove his newly made brace with such intensity in his eyes that its easy enough to see the desire in it now. Such looks were not beneath Viktor, but he often reserved them for when Jayce wasn't looking. It's easier now, now that he doesn't have to hide his wants or desires. Viktor can't stop the noises that escape him with the additional touching, though, his breath coming out in soft exhales with each ministration, as he has to look away when Jayce finally looks at him.

The massage into his bad leg makes him shudder, and he'll put his hand against his mouth to curb the sounds, embarrassed enough as is, he doesn't want to make it any worse for himself. ] Jayce. [ Hissed through his teeth because he wasn't expecting all of this. ]

You are...incorrigible sometimes. [ Said through even breaths as he fights with himself to not come off as too needy, too desperate. It feels amazing, though. He can't help but make some noises of pleasure. ]

I can't fool you.

[ A hum when he says that. It's the truth, though. Not that he really tries to fool Viktor. There's still things Viktor doesn't know, and he is sure in time that the man - his partner - will. Jayce wasn't going to let him go without that knowledge now. Not when so many wounds had been opened today. For now, he was just going to let himself enjoy this. Show Viktor how loved and treasured he is. He wants to make sure every ounce of affection he's held for so long is known, even if not fully understood.

He will give Viktor more time to understand. The way Viktor says his name wakes up ever sense in his body. It's like he can suddenly feel every ounce of everything in the world and he never wants to stop. Viktor's voice saying his name, the way he breathes, everything -- he's so keenly aware of it. He wants more of it.

He works to undo the thigh finally. He'll shift, gently setting the brace to the side with Viktor's shoes. He knows the other can do things like this himself, of course. He always knows. But that doesn't mean he doesn't want to do it himself. With that done, he can resume his touches to Viktor's thigh.

Here, there's almost a tentative touch at first, but his mind urges him forward with the hope of getting more of those sounds from Viktor. His hands move in slow circular motions, using the heel of his palm at times. But he knows this can be better. His eyes flicker his legs then to Viktor. A finger hooks into the pants and a muttered question of -- ]

May I?

[ Maybe he's being polite and cautious. Maybe he's trying to not look too eager (not that he's successful on that front). But he wants to make sure Viktor knows that he's not simply being taken for a ride here, he's got the freedom to change his mind. ]

Mm, yes, well, I do tend to be the smarter of the two of us at times. [ Just have a smirk and a teasing tone of voice as he says that. Jayce was brilliant in his own right, and Viktor knew it all too well; it's one of the things he loved the most about Jayce. Jayce's mind is above all else the most important aspect to why he loved the other so deeply, and his ability to constantly challenge Viktor with his own thoughts.

There's a soft sigh that passes his lips as he closes his eyes momentarily. Taking in the strength and yet the gentle touch that Jayce uses on him. His leg is sore on a good day, but when his brace is removed, it tends to remind him just how bad the pain can be at times. Here, it was worse because of the lack of medicine he'd normally take for the pain. The pain relief provided by the locals of this place is woefully insufficient for his needs. He's been managing, but there's a small gasp when Jayce massages his thigh like that. His eyes shot open at the question posed to him, that smirk resurfacing. ]

Are you asking to be polite? Or to not come off as too eager? [ Viktor's eyes flicker with some mischevious mirth. ] You're still an easy read, Jayce. You don't have to ask for my permission to do this.

[ His arm will reach out to thread lightly through Jayce's hair, tugging his head back a little, so that they can meet eye to eye. He can feel and see how eager Jayce is, how he's holding himself back from this. It's like a build-up of potential energy that's threatening to burst from the very seams of its confinement. ]

You may do what you like- [ 'with me' is the unspoken finishing part to that sentence. Just a spark to ignite that energy to finally spill over. ]

[ Jayce knows Viktor is teasing, the little smile at the corner of his mouth says he understands it's a joke. Logically, he knows they stand side by side. Each with their own strengths and talents - always toe-to-toe on the things that they did. They were partners that worked so well because they treated each other as equals and they could keep up with one another.

He takes notes of each and every one of Viktor's sounds, memorizing where and what kinds of touches caused each one. He wants to make Viktor feel as good as he possibly can. He knows what the goal is here, but that's all the more reason for him to make sure Viktor feels as good as possible. He wants to be sure Viktor understands the extent of his adoration. ]

I -- just wanted to be sure.

[ Viktor knows him so well. He can tell that Jayce is holding back, practicing restraint. It's challenging when he's practically buzzing with excitement and interest. Of course it was a bit of both of trying to reel in his eager nature and the polite behavior instilled in him since he was young. But that aside, he still felt it was the right thing to do. Even with a Viktor who seems to trust him, Jayce still feels like he has to work and earn that trust back.

Permission given, Jayce undoes Viktor's pants without hesitation and tugs. Despite the fact that he's working with a pleasant buzz of excitement, he still is making sure he's plenty gentle with the motions. Gloved fingers working to remove the garment promptly.

And as they are discarded, he suddenly feels extremely overdressed - and he's only really now realizing that his gloves are still on. He simply does not take them off most of the time anymore. He doesn't want to call attention to the arcane corruption crawling up his arm, the glove hiding a portion nearest the wrist - threatening to make its way into his palm. There's a brief moment of hesitation to remove them. He doesn't want to reignite any worry Viktor has over it, since it's simply something that cannot be changed as he is now.

But it would absolutely be weird for him to keep them on. And extremely suspicious. So with that decision quickly made, he puts his index finger in his mouth, gripping the fabric of his glove with his teeth, and pulls it off his right hand - and then similarly off of his left hand. He discards the fabric of the gloves somewhere - to fresh pile of discarded clothing - and realizes how nice it is to have bare hands on Viktor's bare leg. ]

What I like?

[ And he leans in, placing kisses along Viktor's leg where the brace once was. As he places a steady kiss on Viktor's thigh, his eyes drift upwards, letting his lips linger. ]

I am.

[ Because he likes to hear the noises and sounds. He likes to see smirk that touches Viktor's lips or the way that he looks at Jayce. Because for every ounce of affection that he gives Viktor, he gets it in return. Sure, their ways to show it are different, but Jayce knows it when he sees it from his partner. ]

Edited 2025-04-29 19:09 (UTC)

[ Viktor is blushing so deeply now as he watches through half-lidded eyes as the man of his most intricate and enthralling fantasies recreates scenes from each one of them perfectly. His breath hitches in his throat as Jayce removes his pants. His legs and the brace bolted into his femur, exposed. He instinctively shies away ever so slightly because he's not used to this...having someone like Jayce see him so utterly bare, someone who he cares for and loves so deeply, seeing all the damage and distorted nature of his body. It's more about trust than anything he can put into words, and he does trust Jayce. But he still feels lacking, so very lacking, and not at all deserving of all this attention, affection, and devotion. He takes a stuttered inhale of breath as he feels Jayce's lips press against his inner thigh.

He lets out a pleased noise, akin to a moan, flushing ever so slightly as he breaks contact with Jayce's intense gaze. ] You are...doing it, again. Teasing me.

[ It's easy enough to see Viktor's arousal now without his pants there to cover it up, and his blush is down to his chest now as he watches Jayce, his gaze intense. ] I might have to reconsider for next time if you keep this up. So be a good boy and get on with it.

[ He sounds a bit testy as his shifts in place, spreading his good leg a bit more to accommodate Jayce. Of course, it's all bark and no bite; there's certainly no way Viktor would ever deny himself, or Jayce, of this again. ]

[ There's an earnestness in his gaze that is so different from the Jayce Viktor's gotten to know in his time here. It certainly is reminiscent of the one with the younger face, untainted by anything. His eyes flicker up towards Viktor's face, smiling clearly after he notices arousal.

He places a couple of more kisses on his leg, gently placing them on the sore limb. His fingers trace over it, shifting up to grip at Viktor's hips. Each movement is full of intention. There's that accusation of teasing again.

He doesn't think he's teasing. Not exactly. ]

I'm appreciating. [ Really, nothing short of total devotion and adoration. ] I --

[ He almost speaks again then his jaw snaps shut and his eyes get wide. He locks onto Viktor's face trying to decipher the intention behind the words. But he honestly can't think. That good boy went straight to his cock. He was not prepared for that sort of self-discovery. He was not prepared for Viktor to strike a pleasant sensation in his mind with two words. ]

Since you asked nicely.

[ Told him, more like. Which is honestly better (?) than being asked for him. He shifts his weight, moving to stand awkwardly shifting to nudge Viktor further onto the edge of the bed. To be honest, he didn't want to wait long, anyway. Haven't they waited long enough? ]

[ Viktor's breath hitches in his throat as he sees that expression on Jayce's face, feels his lips against his sore leg, it sends a shudder through him as he exhales ever so softly at the gentleness of those touches. He swallows thickly, watching Jayce with rapt attention as Jayce's expression shifts. Don't think he didn't notice because boy, he sure did. Those two words, hm? It's an interesting thing to file away in the back of his mind for later experimentation.

For now, he watches Jayce with a flushed and enthralled look in his eye,s moving ever so slightly as he's pushed further onto the edge of the bed, his eyes fluttering ever so slightly at the sudden close proximity. He will let out a soft huff, a small chuckle escaping him, as he shifts in his position. ] I am only ever nice.

[ Such a lie, but when it comes to Jayce, that is the truth. His hands will reach out, fingers lightly fiddling with the hem of Jayce's shirt and then the waistband of his pants. There's an eagerness in Viktor's movement that he can't control. ]

I would also like to do some appreciating. [ Viktor will pull Jayce closer to him with the band of his pants, his hands roaming downward in a teasing manner, only to stop abruptly at his thighs. He'll give Jayce an amused and challenging look. ]

Take them off. [ A pause. ] Please. [ See. He's being nice and polite, too. ]

You are nice.

[ As far as he's concerned, Viktor saved Jayce when he needed saving most, and then he continued acting kind towards him. But Jayce also saw what Viktor was doing in the Undercity, and though he had to take it apart, his short experience there also told him that it was built on his idea of kindness, too.

He's pretty sure that it's Viktor's default state beneath it all. Which is probably why what Jayce did hurt him so much. But that's different here and now. He had put his heart on display and gave Viktor every reason to squash it.

And he hadn't. ] I can do that.

[ A shift of his weight and he works to undo the brace first. It has to be the first article to be removed because once it's gone, everything else is fairly straightforward. It's for the best that he's taken to not wearing the elaborate coats and boots since arriving, isn't it? Who would have thought that his shift in style would benefit him now? While he took his time undoing Viktor's, he's far less patient with his own as he starts near his foot, working to loosen each piece of it. ]

I'm pretty sure you've been appreciating this whole time.

[ It's not like he hasn't noticed the way Viktor's been looking at him. All of that affection that's so clear to Jayce now that he knows what it looks like. Hm. How long has Viktor looked at him like that? How long has he missed it? ]

You're right. [ A simple agreement that ends up with Viktor blushing almost too much under Jayce's gaze. He fidgets awkwardly in place beneath the other man. But his attention is focused again as he watches Jayce, only to shift himself to help Jayce with removing his brace. His hands sliding up the other's calf and thigh to help undo the straps and metal bracing there first.

Astute. [ Viktor smirks as he finishes with the ones around Jayce's thigh and moves to start working on the clasps around Jayce's knee. ] I can appreciate more when your clothes are off.

[ He is teasing, but also he's not wrong. He is also blushing an insane amount because sometimes his mouth just says what he's thinking automatically. He is pointedly not looking at Jayce now, focused entirely on the other's brace instead. ]

[ There's a small grin and a huff of amusement when Viktor says that. His eyes are bright, light, and happy. All worries are gone, and it's clear by how relaxed his face and body seem to be. It's new for him to feel this at ease - it's been so long since he's relaxed so fully that it's almost like his body has forgotten what it feels like. He watches as Viktor's fingers - skilled at the task - work to remove his brace easily. He shifts a little intentionally leaning towards his good leg to ensure the brace comes off easily. ]

Talking like that, Viktor...

[ He likes it. A lot. He's glad Viktor's opting to say them to him. Even as someone who has confidence in his appearance - it's nice to hear from someone you care for a lot. He is, briefly, concerned he'll worry when those articles of clothing come off and the more physical signs show in the form of scars and what looks similar the Arcane corruption on his arm.

He finally shifts, discarding the brace with far less care than he gave Viktor's. He's gotten pretty good at ignoring the subtle throb of pain in it, and today is no different. Favoring the affection over anything else. ]

I guess that means we should get rid of them faster then, hm?

[ He looks towards Viktor, eyes locked onto him as he starts to undo the top of his pants. ]

Hey, you don't need to look away. Don't take your eyes off of me. [ It sounds more like a request than anything else. Viktor doesn't need to be bashful with him. ]

You...approve? [ Just an amused little smirk from him. ]

But, yes, faster would be appreciated.

[ Viktor exhales with a shaky breath. For all his confidence and words, right now, he's also a bit of a nervous wreck. He's never had many, if any, partners given his disabilities. So, for the first and only one to be a man he's been in love with for almost a decade, he does want it to be perfect. Perfection is not something he can ever attest to being, but he knows Jayce won't look at his faults in disdain or disgust. But that doesn't mean he doesn't still find them to be as such. It's simply an ingrained thought that will take time to change, to heal. So for him to shy and look away as the other undresses is not so strange a reaction.

He doesn't immediately return his attention to Jayce. But he will once the other says those words to him, his face flushed, eyes burning with want and need. A thick swallow as he watches Jayce, and he can't keep his eyes from looking all over the other's body. He feels so deeply inadequate in this moment that he doesn't know what to do besides freeze up slightly. His breathing is getting a bit shallow as he thinks of all the imperfections and abnormalities with his body. Compared to Jayce...he never stood a chance. He has to close his eyes for a second as he grounds himself, listens to Jayce's voice, and the noises the other makes. It's to keep him from ruining this for them both. ]

You're beautiful, Jayce. [ The words just spill out of his mouth just like that. He doesn't even know what compelled him to even say them, but now they're out in the open, and he feels his face get impossibly hot. ]

[ He simply nods. ]

Of course.

[ There's no time where he wouldn't appreciate anything that shows Viktor is interest and eager to be with him. Of course he appreciates the verbal confirmation of it. Of course he listens, too, when Viktor notes about his speed. He is taking his time, isn't he? And maybe instead of him aiming for the perfect moment - to tell Viktor he loved him, to tell him what happened, to have him in his bed - he just let them happen.

He let them be as the rest of their relationship was - a series of events that drew them closer and closer together. Something like the stars aligning perfectly to allow for things to happen exactly right in that moment. For Viktor to ask the right questions, for Jayce to give the right answers, for the touches that made him feel like he'd float away without them.

He shifts his hips, moving the trousers off of his legs, shifting them down off of his hips and to his thighs. He uses his good leg to help kick them off. His arousal is obvious now, but he was never really making an effort to hide that he was turned on at any point, anyway.

There's a soft smile. Jayce is aware how people see him. He's seen the way women and men look at him when he's been forced to be the Man of Progress. But they only really saw him and knew their work. They didn't know him. It's always mattered little how others saw him because he always cared more about how people perceived the work that they did. He wanted that to be loved. But, despite that it certainly feels nice. ]

Thank you, Viktor. [ He says without any denial. ] All that matters to me is how you see me.

[ He lifts a hand, moving his thumb over his cheek. ]

Plus, that blush looks good on you.

[ He moves it back to his own shirt, undoing the top button - but giving Viktor the opportunity to do the rest should he want to. Jayce's eyes are locked onto the other's face, watching for any shift in his expression. ]

Edited 2025-05-14 04:31 (UTC)

[ God Jayce is gorgeous, beautiful, something incomparable to anyone he has ever met or seen. So focused on looking at him Viktor almost doesn't register what Jayce is saying to him, or offering to him. He swallows thickly as he nods, his blush only deepening as he leans up again to help Jayce remove his shirt, hands trailing underneath the fabric as Jayce undoes the buttons.

He's keenly aware of Jayce's stares, and his eyes focus intently on undoing those buttons after he's gotten his fill of running his hands along Jayce's chest and abs. He looks back at him finally, golden eyes meeting Jayce's with a burning need in them. He leans in to press a heated, hungry kiss against Jayce's lips. ]

It suits you as well. The blush and the beard. Don't ever get rid of it. I've become accustomed to it now.

[ He'll finish up undoing that last button before his hands are on Jayce's skin again, hot like the forge he often works in, while Viktor's hands are cool to the touch. He'll give Jayce another kiss, softer this time. ] I'd be disappointed if you did.

[ He lets out pleased murmurs at Viktor's hands on his chest and abs. Moving over skin that's been largely untouched for longer than he even remembers anymore. He shrugs off the top, letting it fall behind him into what has become a scattering of pieces of clothing, discarded along the way.

The scar on his back starts just at his shoulder, the small pattern resembling arcane corruption webs out from there a little. It's not something Jayce is unfamiliar with, he's seen how his body looks backwards and forwards. But this one — something about it makes him think that this was simply how his body had finished healing after he got pulled through.

He keeps his lips near Viktor's lingering. ]

You like it? [ A small smile. ] I thought maybe you'd want me clean shaven.

[ He had considered shaving it off to give Viktor a look at his partner as he once was. But now he knows there's no need. One less thing to worry about. And honestly, hearing that Viktor likes it is nice. Something so visible that shows exactly the time that's passed and what he's experienced. Viktor is the only person he'd consider shaving it for at this point. And so, it works out. He shifts, fully settling into the bed, spreading his legs slightly so that he's straddles Viktor's legs. ]

But I'd never. [ A kiss, soft. ] Ever. [ And another. ] Want to disappoint you. [ This time he leans in, fully sealing their lips together in a kiss that he lingers for. He's making sincere effort to not put any weight on Viktor's legs, but the slight shift in position does help him to feel a little closer. ]

More than I care to admit. [ Viktor will mumble as he feels that heat spread across his face again. His faces go to cup Jayce's face, thumbs drawing soothing circles across his cheeks. Viktor's smile is loving, adoring, and yearning. ] It suits you as part of who you are now, Jayce. I'd rather not take it from you.

[ His breath hitches ever so slightly as Jayce straddles him, his eyes staring back into Jayce's as he shifts to move himself further onto the bed. A hand will curl around the base of Jayce's neck to guide him forward and to lean in to kiss him deeper. ] You can be ridiculous sometimes, with your antics. But disappointment...you are not. But I have never wanted to disappoint either. [ And here he looks away again. ]

You are not disappointed, then? With...this? [ His frail and pitiful body. Too skinny, too crooked, and he knows Jayce said that he doesn't care that it doesn't bother him. But Viktor is still trying to piece that together in his mind. Someone finding him genuinely appealing is still a hard concept for him to grasp. ]

It's something I'm still coming to terms with.

[ He is glad Viktor likes it. A smile settles into his features, chasing after Viktor and placing soft kisses as they talk. His lips move down, trailing down Viktor's throat and to his chest. He settles his lips there, placing a few extra kisses. He likes to feel the way Viktor breathes, listen to his heartbeat — all the things that make Viktor alive and here with him. They were grounding and reassuring.

He's done a lot of wrong and there's a lot wrong going on with him now. And he knows he's changed a lot since Viktor's time. The change has to be even more jarring for his partner. But he's never once rejected him for the ways that he's changed. How could Jayce not love him? Viktor makes it easy for Jayce to love him.

He eyes Viktor and smiles with his lips against his chest. ]

Not even a little and I'll prove it. [ It's gentle when he says it this time. Still said as if it's fact, though. Like he's never been so sure of something. ] I will remind you every day, too.

[ When he says it, Viktor will know that he absolutely means it. This is your life now, Viktor. It's a small thing to do, he thinks. He knows he's not even touched on what he'd do for Viktor, though. Finally he moves his hands, shifting to take Viktor's shirt off of his shoulders so that he can discard it with everything else. ]

I want you to tell me if anything is hurting. And we'll immediately make some changes.

[ Last thing he wants to do is somehow make Viktor hurt more than his default. ]

[ Those trails of kisses get soft exhales and pleased sighs from Viktor. One of his hands coming up to the base of Jayce's neck to card his fingers through Jayce's hair. He shifts and writhes just a little bit under the carefully placed ministrations of Jayce. His eyes widen a bit as he lets out a soft, clipped laugh before wrapping both his arms around Jayce's neck. He'll lean to kiss him with a smoldering look in those eyes as he watches Jayce. ]

Remind me every day? We do have a bit of time to make up for. But I'm certainly up for the challenge. [ The amusement in his eyes is ever present as he pulls Jayce down into the bed with him. His breath hitched a bit with his cheeks pink from flush and desire. ] I'll be sure to let you know.

[ His hands trail down to the waistband of Jayce's undergarments, hands dipping in to slowly pull them down beneath Jayce's hips. Viktor isn't at all surprised by the size of him as a hand wraps around the base of Jayce's shaft. Viktor's movements are slow, steady, and gentle as he looks directly back at Jayce to see his reactions. ] You'll be sure to tell me as well if anything hurts, yes?

[ Said a bit breathlessly as he continues to stroke Jayce. ]

[ He enjoys the sounds, drinking in each and every one of them. Memorizing the way Viktor reacts to each and every touch. Enjoying the amusement and sound of his voice when he talks. Loving the look in his eyes when Jayce gets looks at them. He has really been making Viktor wait here, even. He's been feeling the man out here. It's not like he had been super prepared for it to go down this path, either. It was an exciting turn of events.

The moan that escapes him when Viktor wraps around him is low, pleased. He ruts his hips into Viktor's hands, though it's not immediately intentional. His body is seeking the touch - the friction. ]

Yeah....

[ He doubts he'll even notice if anything hurts right now. Maybe after he wakes up from a long nights sleep that he'll finally be able to get for the first time in months - the voices in his head having been at least temporarily silenced (or perhaps: drowned out). He brings his hands up to settle on Viktor's hips. ]

Hey - Vik... [ Trying to think while he still can cling to thought before he gets so wrapped up in this that he forgets logic. ] There's uh - some lube in the bedside table. We'll need -- [ He can reach without hardly moving, he thinks. But he definitely doesn't want to get to a point where he's forgotten where he stashed it. Just don't ask him why it's not totally full when he manages to get it from where it's stored. ]

[ The moans a nice touch, is what Viktor thinks but doesn't say, at least not with words. His eyes, however, speak of something else entirely. Like he wants to draw out more of those noises from Jayce the further they go into this. But there's time for that, they have all the time in the world here to explore each and what they enjoy and want, and need from each other.

Viktor's breath shudders ever so slightly as he watches Jayce reach to grab hold of the lubricant in his bedside table. His lips turned up into a small smirk as golden eyes flickered dangerously. He'll take the bottle, squeezing out a generous amount onto his hand. ] It's not full.

[ An astute observation no doubt. ] Have you been thinking about me all this time while you've used it, Jayce? [ Viktor, stop. ]

You're quite...big, so we'll have to start slow. [ He's treading dangerous ground here as his hand moves back over to stroke Jayce's length again, coating it evenly as he thumbs the head of Jayce's cock in a teasing manner. That same hand gets another dab of it as Viktor pulls down his undergarments, his half hard cock finally freed with a sigh from him as his hand moves slowly between his legs. ] Have you imagined me prepping myself for you?

[ It's slow but he pushes a lone finger passed the tight muscle of his entrance, a soft, low noise escapes him as he looks directly back at Jayce as he does it. ] Or maybe I'm going too-too slow and you take matters into your own hands?

[ He closes his eyes as his hips roll without encouragement, and the finger he has seated inside himself is pulled out slowly with a raspy gasp. His free hand cups Jayce's cheek, only to turn his head downward to make him watch as he reinserts his finger inside of himself. ]

Tell me what you'd like to see, Jayce, and you may have it.

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